Singing to flowers and Stairs.

Ahlo, everybody!

You may recall me mentioning the Corpse Plant at the museum in my last blog. She is amazing. Lois is. Last night I got really bored, so I decided to write a song for her. After thirty pain-filled minutes, my song was complete. I called it: An Ode to Lois. Very original, huh? Anyway, I posted it on facebook and it got many comments and likes. I enjoyed that. Then I brought my guitar to work this morning so that I could serenade Lois in person and, hopefully, persuade her to bloom. That didn't work... But! My song did catch the attention of a few museum employees, who, after recording me and my lovley assistant Stacey (she held the lyrics for me while I played), proceeded to post the video on the museum website. After I officially got off work, it was suggested that I go back to Lois and play for her some more because the crowd had gotten bigger. Yay! So I did. I felt awkward because people kept on coming up to me and asking if I was the one who played for the flower (No, I'm just carrying this guitar because I am a rebel. A rebel with a guitar). Then people were taking pictures of me and I didn't know what to do... So I just kinda smiled awkwardly and looked away. I don't deal with attention very well. By about 5:30, I was getting overheated and tired. So I played An Ode to Lois one last time (the security guard accompanied me that time because he had memorized the lyrics. He's cool like that) and then left. Fun times. *passes out*

*wake up*

Stairs: An invention made for people who actually have willpower. Not me. Every time I walk up the stairs, I get all tired. It's rather pathetic, really. My solution to avoid being all tuckered out: Get rid of stairs (Excercize? Never heard of it). I mean, this is the 21st century, after all. We have awesome things like laptops, iPods and electric bread-slicers. I think we should ditch the primative staircase and update it with something more modern. I think that every flight of stairs in America should be replace with an escalator. Not an elevator, because those things are scary and I don't like to be in confined spaces. And that's all I'm saying on the subject.

Sorry, this post was really short. But I literally feel like I am going to pass out. I promise I'll make up for it next time.

Bye bye!!

Corpse Flowers and uses for watermelon.

Ni hao!
I learned that yesterday at work. It's pretty cool, eh?

So, basically H-town has been abuzz with news of a Corpse Plant. "Corpse Plant? That sounds unhygenic! It kind of reminds me of Little Shop of Horrors, Kelsey." you say. "I know, huh?" I respond. This plant can be found at none other than *drum role* MY MUSEUM!! Okay, not "my" museum... But the museum that I work at. It's pretty awesome. Everyone that works there is very excited about it. It's pretty nerdy. My friends and I were getting really excited about it. As a matter of fact, my friend, let's call her June, and I devised a plan: Since I am just awesome, I get to leave the camp a little bit earlier than her. She instructed me to, once the clock struck 3, dart out the door and up the stairs (summer camps are held in the basement. Pretty cool, huh?), then to run down the main hall to the Butterfly Center (that's where the plant is being kept). She then instructed me to run back downstairs and tell her whether or not it reeked of rotting flesh. Oh, did I forget to mention why it's called the Corpse Plant? When it blooms, which is very rarely (this is the 2nd ever to bloom in Texas), it gives off a very strong stench... Of rotting corpses. So basically, everyone is sitting on pins and needles (that sounds painful), and wanting to get a whiff of the plant. Why? Because it's FRIGGIN' AWESOME!! Anyway, I completed the task given to me by June. I ran up the stairs and basked in the glory of the plant. But I was disappointed to find out that it had not bloomed... No rotting flesh smell for Kelsey. Or June. Or any of the good people of the museum. Sad day. I will continue to frequent the plant every day until it blooms. I will report when it does. And I will attach a stench to the computer so that you, too, may smell it's odor. That'd be pretty awesome...

Also, today I went to the party of one of my dear friends. This party was filled with "double rainbows", "snake-lizards", gongzooblers, and watermelon. My friends and I, being the good citizens we are, decided that instead of throwing away the watermelon seeds, we would return them back to Mother Earth. But simply planting them in the ground would not do. Not for us. We decided to have some fun. We decided to spit the seeds at on-coming traffic. Yes. Thinking about it now, the seeds didn't technically make it to the soil... It made it to the concrete. The asphault. So they won't really be...sprouting tiny melons. They will be...sizzling and...and dying.... Hm...
Anyway, I got to thinking, because I do that sometimes. I was thinking of possible ways that the humble watermelon could help us. Here are a few I came up with:
1) You can nom them. They are yummy, therefore, rather nommable.
2) You can use them as a stylish, biodegradable paper-weight.
3) You can use them to replace Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head. Potatoes (potatos?) are SO last month.
4) You can scoop out their delicious core and use the rind as a helmet. So fun.

Alrighty then. That's all that I got for now.

Tune in next time on: THE INTERNET!